If you had told me this time two years ago that I would be officially unemployed as I embark on full time motherhood to an adorable baby, engaged to the love of my life, a qualified yoga teacher and the happiest I have ever been, I would have thought you were crazy.
This time two years ago, I was single having recently given up on internet dating, had a successful international career, a wardrobe full of designer clothes, shoes and handbags, millions of frequent flyer points, regularly ate some of London’s best restaurants and enjoyed girly nights out full of drinking, dancing and laughing. I had saved companies millions, supported the deregulation of the electricity market in Singapore, seriously increased my profanity use whilst working at a media company and had had tea and meetings at No. 10.
I had also nearly fully recovered from breaking my shoulder blade or so I thought, had recently returned from a fasting detox in Thailand and was attending Bikram yoga every day, being most of the way through a 100 day challenge.
It seems that the later yoga-loving, honest and more down to earth me is who I am more comfortable with. So, since I broke my shoulder 8 years ago but really from when I started listening to my heart and met the people who would help me change this time two years ago, I have been on a journey of serious changes.
I know you are probably thinking that converts are always annoyingly vocal about their experiences but there is a reason for that. When you feel this good you want to share it. I didn’t even know what Magnifed Healing, osteopathy, homeopathy or the sanskrit for your chakras are. Let alone what NCT stood for or how happy you can be when you listen to your heart and make decisions based on what feels right rather than what you think you should do.
Yes, it was a scary process and still is as I have no idea what comes next. It was however well worth:
~ the ‘clearings’, read, really bad colds where you can and do sometimes leak from every hole in your body whilst just wanting to curl up and die
~ the risks, loving someone unconditionally and hoping that they might do the same and
~ the responsibility, being sole reason for someone’s life, bringing them into the world and helping them to subsequently survive and thrive.
It has also meant that I have had to leave people behind on this journey as they weren’t yet ready for the change or couldn’t cope with the changes in me. Hopefully some will come back when they are ready but that is their journey and that is another really important lesson. It isn’t all about you and most people’s reactions to you are all about them, so you just have to love yourself and send love out into the world and trust that it will all be perfect.
As I have heard recently from a number of people life is all about change and if you don’t change/grow, you aren’t living. I am so glad that I have embraced life and look forward to the changes that it continues to bring.